Friday, February 03, 2012

Root Root Root for the Giants (I Guess)

Well the Superbowl is upon us and yet again I will be watching it for the sheer genius of the commercials since I don't particularly like either the Giants or Patriots. But the game is more fun to watch when you can pull for one team over the other. So why am I begrudgingly cheering for the Giants. Is it because they are underdogs according to Vegas and everyone likes an underdog? Heck no, in fact I usually root for the underdog to get beaten badly. Face it folks, when you were a kid watching wrestling, did you really cheer for the Brooklyn Brawler to beat Hulk Hogan? Am I rooting for the Giants because Manhattan clam chowder is better than New England chowder? Again, no. New England clam chowder superior, Manhattan chowder inferior.

No, I am rooting for the Giants for one simple reason, during the regular season matchup in Foxboro, the Patriots didn't do their job and lost. Had they won, the Giants miss the playoffs and my beloved Eagles win the division instead, and we could be talking about an Eagles Vs. Patriots rematch (more likely we would be talking about a Packers vs. Patriots rematch, but that is besides the point). And before you start spouting "facts" like if the Eagles hadn't blown 5 4th quarter leads, they would have made the playoffs, that is irrelevant, the only fact that matters is the Patriots lost to the Giants costing the Eagles a playoff spot and that is why I cannot in good conscience cheer for the Patriots.

Though the Superbowl is meaningless to me, there was another bowl this week. One that has far deeper consequences than who wins a stupid football game. I am talking of course of the Wing Bowl. Kobayashi set a new record by eating more than 300 wings. While I am awed by his glutenous feat, is this a sign of Japanese resurgence and America's decline? It may and it should have us all concerned.

Wednesday, February 01, 2012

Endorsement Withdrawn

Previously, I endorsed Newt Gingrich for president. However, I am saddened that I must withdraw that endorsement. I endorsed him on the basis of his ideas and took him on his word that he had changed in the years since he left Congress. His claim that since he was now a grandfather and older and wiser than the past was given credence by his early debate performances.

But the way he has run his campaign in recent weeks has been less as an advocate for those ideas and more a vitriolic attempt to personally destroy Governor Romney by twisting and omitting facts to make Mr. Romney appear unqualified to be president. His recent robocalls in Florida claiming Governor Romney callously denied kosher meals to holocaust survivors was the last straw. His actions as of late have proven to me that leopard doesn't change his spots.

For these reasons, I must publicly withdraw my endorsement of the former Speaker and will not endorse another candidate this primary cycle. All I can say, is I hope for brokered convention where we can nominate a positive voice for conservatism. To help produce that result, I will be voting for Ron Paul in the Virginia primary.

Friday, November 04, 2011

2012 Endorsement: I'm With Newt

In 2008, I endorsed former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee. The next day, he went on to win the Hawkeye Cauci. I have been asked over the last several months when I would be making my 2012 endorsement, well that time has come.

I have spent the last several months studying up on the candidates, researching their positions and watching their debate performances. Time and again, I come to the same conclusion: Newt Gingrich is the right person to lead America through these trying economic times.

I vividly recall the elections of 1994 as a High School Sophomore. As I would recall in my senior year, the Republican Revolution was the most memorable news event of my high school years, though most in my class chose the OJ verdict. But, the Republican Revolution would not have been possible without Newt Gingrich. His Contract with America was a triumph on the battlefield of ideas. I often wonder what condition America’s fiscal house would currently be in if all the items had become law, such as the balanced budget amendment, or had not been struck down by the courts (the line item veto). Under his leadership, Congress passed comprehensive welfare reform and helped orchestrate the first balanced budget in decades.

While his past legislative record is stellar, this election is about the future, not the past. Speaker Gingrich has provided an impressive agenda to move our nation forward. The 21st Century Contract with America provides not only a vision, but a realistic timeframe to implement that vision. While many candidates choose to focus on executive orders in the first 100 days, Mr Gingrich provides an outline for an entire two term presidency. His plan demonstrates a knowledge of the process that seems to be lacking from other candidates.

Mr. Gingrich is also the only candidate to clearly state that Republicans ought not fight amongst ourselves, but be united in our effort to make President Obama a one term president. This is why, in the spirit of his campaign, I say I am with Newt not for Newt and while I prefer his vision as the nominee, I will join him in supporting whomever emerges as the GOP nominee. And I agree, any GOP nominee will do a better job than our current President.

Though, I must urge my readers to support Speaker Gingrich and his bold vision for America.

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Drunken Ramblings

So sitting around drinking some scotch and realizing I had not updated this in far too long. To remedy the situation, I thought I would share some drunken ramblings.

1) First my 2012 intentions, as in 2008 I have decided since I am constitutionally prohibited from running for president in 2012 due to age requirements, I again will not be a candidate. And like 2008, I will endorse a candidate when the time is right.

2) Watching a sci-fi original movie starring Debbie Gibson and Tiffany. The movie, Mega-Python vs. Gatoroid, has taught me 2 things. 1) The movie gets better the more I drink and 2) my childhood fantasy has not changed; I still want to have a 3-way with Tiffany and Debbie Gibson.

3) Yesterday was the 25th anniversary of the Challenger disaster. It brought back many memories, including being in 2nd grade and seeing the disaster unfold and remembering President Reagan's touching tribute. It also reminded me of all the tasteless jokes that emerged from it reminding us that the greatest humor does truly emanate from the greatest tragedy. My only complaint is the joke link is missing perhaps the greatest Challenger joke:

Q: Why does Christa McCauliffe have dandruff

A: She can't find her head and shoulders.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Triumphant Return!

In an announcemement that is sure to knock Ted Kennedy and Dominick Dunne out of the headlines, I am announcing my triumphant return to fantasy football.

While I hold no illusions that this year is anything but a rebuilding year for my franchise and unlikely to repeat past glories, I am looking forward to getting back out there and laying the groundwork for the future.

...I just hope Brett Favre is still available when it is my turn to pick.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Exiting with Grace

"Now you will not swell the rout
Of lads that wore their honours out,
Runners whom renown outran
And the name died before the man."


Having won three fantasy football championships in five years, the last with extreme hubris having named my team "I'm the Greatest" I feel that no repeat performance will reclaim that glory and by most any measure future fantasy football teams of mine will be judged to be failures by comparison of my last championship. I have thus decided to retire from Fantasy Football and preserve my iconic status and to always be remembered as the greatest.

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

2008 Endorsement

When I announced almost a year ago that due to Constiutional reasons, I would not be running for President, I promised to endorse a candidate. Well here we are, just under 24 hours before the first in the nation "Hawkeye Cauci," or the Iowa Caucuses to you non-political types, and I have realized I have not yet made an endorsement. But with this post, I intend to keep my promise, and yes, I fully expect this to be the endorsement that rocks the political world.

Out of the entire GOP field, I am left with two who I would whole-heartedly support in November and a few who I vote for if I had to, and two who would cause me to vote for a third party.

Three candidates have convinced me that they say what they believe and are not simply pandering for votes by taking positions popular with the party. However, only two of these candidates, Mike Huckabee and John McCain, have demonstarted some depth by not beginning every sentence with either "On 9/11..." or "After 9/11..."

So it comes down to John McCain and Mike Huckabee and out of these two, I am proud to announce that I am formally endorsing Mike Huckabee for President. Of the two Mike Huckabee is the fresher face, has had to work with a legislature dominated by Democrats to enact any of his initiatives, and is not responsible for the most egregious encroachment on free political speech in my lifetime, the McCain-Feingold Campaign Finance Reform bill. For these reasons, I urge GOP primary and Caucus voters to support Mike Huckabee as I am.

As for the two I will not vote for under any circumstances, you have Alan Keyes who really has no qualifications to be President and you've got another former Governor who was for abortion before he was against it, he was for gun control before he was against it, and he was for gay marriage before he was against it. As I am writing this I realize, Mitt Romney makes John Kerry look like a "straight shooter."

While I don't make it a habit to endorse Democrats, in this case I endorse Dennis Kucinich. This is not because I agree with any of his policies, but because he is so out there with his ideas and UFO sightings that any GOP nominee could beat him, and this includes Alan Keyes (who would do so without my support.)